Insomnia
by JapanCat
Summary: Ways to spend seven to eight hours on a sleepless night. Or in which Hiei needs to go sleep in his own room for a change. Seriously.


Insomnia.

Summary: Apparently we forget between now and the time it took to load up this page. Basically... Ways to spend seven to eight hours a night.

I DON'T OWN YU YU HAKUSHO AND CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR AWESOME.

Notes and similar things: This is horribly inaccurate seeing how these guys seem to have no issues with their sleep schedules even though they probably spend about forty five percent of the day napping... Maybe. (I'm jealous.) Meh. I dunno. I have no idea why I wrote this. Probably a way to vent out my frustrations with spending four nights out of the week wondering half the night how I can spent the seven or eight hours that we're supposed to spend in darkness. (If your name is not Neil Gaiman, that is. And that's probably still true right now.) And that also depends on the day of the week too. If you disregard all the failures in logic in that respect, I hope you enjoy this one. If you don't then... Congrats. I just wasted two to five minutes of your valuable time.

We begin in... Now.

...

After wasted efforts on falling asleep, Mukuro finally got out of bed and shuffled in darkness to turn on the light. She suddenly became aware that Hiei was still in the room for whatever excuse he had this time. She decided against turning it on.

"What are you doing?" he asked her.

"Can't sleep," she replied simply, turning towards the direction of his voice. "...You know your eyes glow in the dark?"

"...I don't think they're supposed to." Uncomfortably. "Turn on the lights." He squinted before becoming adjusted to the sudden burst of light. "What do you mean by that?"

"Isn't it self explanatory?"

"No what I meant was..."

"I just can't sleep. I don't think it really needs much of a reason. It happens to everyone at some point in their lives, just some have it happen more often than others. And in any case, this could only mean that I would sleep like the dead tomorrow. That's usually how these things work out. There's an awful lot I could do in this time but I can't do it all right here so as long as you're in this room." Hint? You could say that.

"What did you usually do before when you had this problem?"

"Depends on what was happening at the time. Lack of sleep can be justified depending on the situation. Insomnia only becomes insomnia when equilibrium is found everywhere but in sleep cycles. When it begins anyway. You never know the values of sleep until..."

"None of what you just said meant anything to me. Go out and have fun putting the first footsteps in the mud or something."

"Well, you really can't be the first to put footsteps in mud because they can still last from yesterday. If you meany that were immediately placed by a person then when would the cut off time be? Midnight? What if someone was in the mud which happened to be in front of the door and they stepped into their house just after the clock struck midnight? Does that still count? And I doubt I was the first to put steps in this general area anyway. People travel at all hours, you know."

"Damn, you really are awake."

"What about you? You woke up when I got up? That doesn't sound right."

"I'm USUALLY a light sleeper. There's times when I'm not. You know that."

"Apparently not if I'm asking."

"What are you planning on doing now?"

"I really aren't sure. Eight hours doesn't sound so bad when it's referring to the time we're all awake. You could easily kill that time because you're not limited due to of the lack of light. But at night your possibilities are significantly limited. Don't worry about it. Just go back to sleep." A couple of hours passed and Hiei woke up again.

He looked at the paper on the table with an intricate pattern of lines scribbled on it (so it appeared... just for that moment). After a few moments of decoding the thing, he said, "You drew a maze."

"Yeah. You feel up to solving it? I can't. I made it." She pushed the paper and a pen to him.

"Let me see that." He took the pen. Upon noticing the entrance and the location of the exit, he drew a straight line across.

"Hiei. You can't do that."

"Oh, shut up, Mukuro. Who said you can't? This is what pisses me off about these mazes. People always complain about being unable to make it out. Why can't they just take a stick of dynamite and blow your way out?"

"That's a lot of dynamite. No one walks into a maze expecting to blow the whole thing to hell. That's just too easy."

"Why can't you climb up the wall and follow your way out?"

"I'd be surprised if YOU could. And that's not how you're supposed to do it. Really."

"Says who? What makes them have the authority to control your mind like that? The Maze Police?"

"But's it's theoretical. If these were solid walls you normally wouldn't do any of those things. When Theseus went to kill the Minotaur, he only had a string to guide him."

"THIS," he pressed a finger on the paper to make his point, "is paper. You can do whatever the hell you want on paper-land."

"For someone who just woke up, you sure are thinking clearly."

Hiei shrugged and sat back. Half an hour later, he fell asleep again. A few hours later, he woke up again. He cocked a brow. "Still up?"

"I should ask the same of you," she replied. "By the way, you have a really pleasant sleeping face. There's just something so peaceful about iy."

"That's really creepy."

"I also came to the conclusion that viruses should become a thing that is semi-living and that most life's point is to spread the gene pool further from a evolutionary standpoint and that last names are more powerful as the years go by. And if gendercide continues it would be no wonder that men are so angry."

"You're thinking too much. That's why you can't sleep."

"Or am I unable to sleep so I'm thinking too much?"

"Don't repeat what I just said."

"I didn't... By the way, your birthday really only starts the minute that you born. You don't turn a certain age at midnight unless you were born on midnight. And the only one who should be rewarded on that birthday should be the mother. She was the one who gave birth to you... So you're just being rewarded for existing."

He hesitantly got up and put a hand over her eyes. "Shut up and go to sleep."

"Your hands are calloused and you look like a nail biter."

"And you have really delicate hands."

"Define delicate."

"Don't ask. Just take it any way you want. YOU look like a nail biter."

"I think nail biting is a nasty habit. Don't repeat what I said."

"Get out of my head and sleep!"

"I will once you get out of mine and worry about yourself. I fail to see how my lack of sleep disturbs your own sleep cycle and when you argue that you wake up because of the sound of my movement, you contradict yourself by sleeping peacefully while I move from one end of the room to the next."

"I can't have you not sleeping."

"I'm not sure whether to be flattered or disturbed." Awkward silence. "You know I once had a dream that I was some human soldier at war in a trench. But often I've wondered if the soldier is dreaming that his is me. Often I've wondered."

"And why not say we're all just someone's dream or that we're dreaming we're having this conversation or that you're not just talking to a wall in an asylum or that I'm not even here in general?"

"Or possibly that we're hooked up to a machine that makes us all think we're experiencing what we're experiencing?"

"I don't think who ever runs that would have us live the way we've lived. The two of us I mean."

"But does every experience have to be pleasurable? I mean if we only know happiness then we don't know what happiness. It's only pain that makes us aware of it."

"I'm too tired to think about things like things like that. Just shut up and go to sleep. Count sheep or something."

"I've already counted a thousand. As I already told you I can't get sleep tonight. About five hours and forty five minutes have passed."

He sat at the foot of the bed and laid back. He patted the bed. "Lay back."

"No. Not with you there."

"Not in that way!" He sat up, appalled.

"Or possibly that you talk in your sleep so I'd have to listen to you right next to me... But you walked into that one for doing what you're doing."

"Anyone would have thought you were thinking of THAT."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Look. Just do what I'm doing." he laid back and was asleep within minutes. She shrugged and moved to the chair that he just left. She stared at him and shrugged again, still refusing to take him up on his offer.

_That is actually kind of forward if you look at it the right way._ Her thoughts then turned slowly to why this damned man can't just sleep in his own room for a change- _Of all the places he had to spend all his time in, it has to be this one._ Not that she didn't enjoy his company. It just didn't make too much sense to her that he should do so. _I guess I should treasure these types of things while I still have him there for me. I mean, this is only a temporary thing, right?_

She decided that she would go for a walk and just as she was about to walk out Hiei growled at her, "What ARE you doing NOW?"

"Leaving the room since I'm so loud apparently."

"Stay in here."

"First you tell me to leave to kill time and to keep it quiet and now you're telling me to stay here. Make up your mind. And moreover, why can't you sleep in your own room?"

"Your presence relaxes me."

"How charming." She crossed her arms. Note the sarcasm here. "Then go to your own room and imagine my presence."

"That's disturbing."

"Your previous comment was too."

"Get over here and sleep!"

"Not with you on the same bed."

Hiei rolled off. "Fine! I'll sleep on the floor! Happy?"

"That's horrible! Now you're on the hard cold floor and you'll probably end up with back problems some time from now."

"Quit antagonizing me! What do you really normally do on sleepless nights anyway? You never answered me."

"Look, I was still in power when I last had this problem. So I did have lots of things to think about to keep myself busy. Those sleepless nights were justified. Maybe I did something today to...? Doesn't matter actually."

"Exactly. Go to sleep." He went back to the chair.

"For two hours."

"For two hours. It's better than none, right?"

"Yeah. But it doesn't change the fact that..."

"Just shut up and lay down." She shrugged and do so. "Close your eyes..." And she did so again. Apparently he was satisfied with that response so he drifted off to sleep. A couple pf hours passed and he woke up again

"So did you sleep?" he asked her.

"No. I actually just sat there and stared at the ceiling."

"Damn you!" And so ended the time of waiting.

...

Notes: This felt kind of pointless and plotless (if that were a word.) And one sleepless night does not classify a person as an insomniac. If that were true then we've all been insomniacs... Except if you're narcoleptic. So basically I have no idea why this title is Insomnia. Mukuro's dream was a reference to World War I whose style of warfare was summed up.... Yeah. History nerd.

Anyway, thanks for reading this. As always your feedback is always welcome.


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